Amy: Oh, Maddy. I'm so sorry you're hurting. Have you told Joe how you feel?

Maddy: Good God, no. Are you kidding? I told y'all some of his background. If I said the L word, he'd just put up more barriers.

Christine: You don't know that. Maybe he's just waiting for you to say it first. He could be thinking "By God, I stuck my neck out last time, this time it's her turn."

Maddy: There's a terrifying thought. Especially since he's given me NO indication that he wants something serious. I'm not even sure I want something this serious. My home, my family, and both of you are in Austin. What am I doing falling for a guy who lives in a whole different state?

Christine: Talk about your lame excuses! Maddy, houses can be sold, your family drives you nuts, and even though we'd miss meeting you for lunch, friends should never stand in the way of love. As for repairing this rift with Joe, I think you need to tell him at least some of how you feel. You don't have to use the big L word, but tell him something.

Maddy: How can I when he's not talking to me?

Christine: Sheesh. You wait until all the little kiddies are asleep, you knock on his door, and when he answers, you say, "Yo, Joe, let's talk."

Maddy stared at Christine's post for several long minutes before closing her computer with a snap. Advice was easy for someone who didn't have to take it.

Realizing the sun was setting, she walked out onto her balcony. The sound and scent of the mountains at dusk filled her senses. Down in the camp, she saw a light glowing in Joe's apartment.

Maybe Christine was right. Maybe Joe wanted her to make the first move. She tried to picture it in her mind, what she would say and what his response might be. Fear swelled inside her with staggering swiftness, making her heart pound and her palms sweat. Good heavens, was this how Joe had felt all those years ago when he'd been building up the courage to propose?

And then she'd told him no?

Guilt stabbed at her, making her wince.

Although what if the reverse happened this time? What if she got up the nerve to tell him she loved him, only to have him reject her?

She stared at the light in the office a long time as the shadows lengthened and the air grew chilled. Finally, the campers on flag duty headed for the pole next to the big bell. Mama's voice came over the speakers with the evening prayer as the girls lowered and folded the flag. Then taps began to play, a soft, sleepy version that she usually found soothing.

Tonight it sounded so plaintive her chest ached.

She watched as the campers walked away from the flag pole. Watched Mama leave the office, climb into her golf cart, and head toward the little owner's house on the rise near the gate. And she wished for the sight of Joe stepping out of the office and heading up toward the Craft Shack as he'd done every night for that magical week.

The sky grew darker, the air colder.

She finally turned and went back inside, where she lay awake most of the night. The narrow bed had seemed so crowded with Joe in it, making them laugh more than once.

Now it felt far too empty.

Her friends were right. She needed to make^the first move. With sleep evading her, she searched her mind for the right way to take the first step. If only she knew where that step would lead. Why did love have to be so scary and painful?


The following evening, Joe glared at the paperwork in front of him, wishing it would do a better job of distracting him from thoughts of Maddy-and the temptation to go up to the Craft Shack and beg his way back into her bed. Everything had been perfect. Couldn't they just go back to that?

Watching her leave at the end of summer was going to be hard enough. How much more would it hurt if he let her all the way into his life? If he let her be part of making plans for the boot camp, it would serve as one more reminder of her when she was gone. Couldn't she see that?

At the sound of crunching gravel in the parking lot, he looked up and was surprised to see his mother entering the office. He glanced at his watch. "You're a little early for taps, aren't you?"

"I thought I'd come by for a visit. Things have been so busy, we hardly get time to talk."

"Oh?" He tensed. Anytime Mama Fraser wanted to "talk" she definitely had something to say.

"Yes." Smiling, she sat in the chair between his desk and the back door. Outside, evening was settling over the valley. He could hear the campers enjoying their free time between dinner and lights-out with a game of tag out on the playing field. "I was up at the Craft Shack having a nice cup of tea with Madeline. She showed me some of the artwork she's done for the show. What talent that girl has!"

"Yes, I know." His gut twisted at the mere mention of her name.

Mama leaned forward to lay an envelope in front of him. "She asked me to give this to you."

"What is it?" He frowned suspiciously at the envelope. As strained as things had been between them the last few days, it could be anything from a scathing note telling him off to a letter of resignation. The thought of the latter sent panic racing through him. Seeing her every day was killing him by slow degrees, but it was better than not seeing her at all.

"Well?" his mother prompted. "Aren't you going to open it?"

Bracing himself for a "Dear John, screw you" note, he sliced the envelope open with a knife, then stared at the printed card inside. "It's an invitation to Maddy's show."

"So it is."

He felt a surge of hope, followed by frustration. "What? She couldn't be bothered to hand it to me in person?"

"With the way you've been acting lately?" His mother lifted a brow at him. "Maybe she didn't want to get growled at."

His teeth clamped together. "I haven't been growling at her."

"No?" She chuckled, then sighed. "Maybe not, but you have made it clear you don't want her here."

"Did she tell you that?" He fought the need to get up and pace.

"No. But I have eyes. You've been giving her the classic freeze-out for more than a week now." She shook her head sadly. "And just when I thought things were going well between you two."

"They were going well, until she-"

"Until she what?

"Nothing." He straightened a stack of papers on his desk.

"Joe, do you want Maddy to leave?"

"No!" Alarm kicked up his heart rate. "I want-"

"What?"

Everything! he nearly shouted. i want her to love me and mean it this time. The way I love her so much it's eating me up inside. I want her to love me the way she loved Nigel the Geek.

Just thinking the name made him want to rip something apart. Instead he went back to shuffling papers. "If Maddy sent you down here to act as a go-between, tell her there's no reason for her to leave. I'm perfectly capable of respecting the boundaries she set."

"Are you saying she's the one freezing you Out?"

"It's not that simple." He scrubbed a hand over his face. "Look, I appreciate your concern, but I'm really not comfortable discussing certain things with my mother."

"Ah." A knowing twinkle came into her eyes. "She cut you off."

"Mom." Heat crept up his neck. "Do you mind?"

She laughed. "No wonder you're so grouchy."

"I'm not grouchy."

"Moody, then. Lack of sex can do that to a man."

He glared at her. "You're determined to discuss this, aren't you?"

She settled back in the chair. "How about if I save you from talking by telling you a story?"

"Suit yourself." He went back to his paperwork.

"I remember when I met the Colonel."

He groaned aloud at those familiar words, even though he liked this story. He just hated that it had a different purpose each time she told it.

"It was at a USO dance during the war. Not too many people considered him to be a particularly handsome man, even back then. But he was…" She tipped her head as if picturing him in her mind, and a glow came over her face. "Compelling."

Joe narrowed his eyes. "Last time you told this story, he was 'frightening.' "

"That too." She laughed. "I can still picture him as he walked into the room, scowling at everyone. The other girls were all too scared to go over and greet him, even though that was what we were there for, to make the servicemen feel at home. To get their minds off the war for a bit. So I watched him for a long time. Long enough to see how he looked at the couples cutting a rug on the dance floor, with this odd blend of longing and fear. Then he'd look at us girls and scowl even harder. I finally realized he was even more afraid of us than we were of him." Her eyes twinkled with laughter.

"So I marched right over there, my knees shaking the whole way-because what if I was wrong? Maybe he was as mean as he looked. I had no guarantee he wouldn't plumb take my head off in one big bite. Things are like that between men and women, you know. Very scary, with no guarantees."

Joe frowned in confusion. "We're already at the moral of the story?"

"Heavens no. The moral comes at the end. Now where was I?"

"You asked the Colonel to dance, only he wasn't a colonel back then. He was Major Patrick Fraser."

"Right. I asked him if he wanted to dance. He looked down at me from way up there." She tipped her head back, looking up, then rolled her eyes sideways to look at Joe. "Even before my bones shrank, I wasn't too tall. And do you know what he said?"

Joe lowered his voice to a deep bass. " 'I'm not sure that's wise, miss, since my feet are bigger than all of you put together.' "

She nodded. "So I asked him if he'd like to sit and talk instead. We were the last two to leave the USO that evening, and then only because they kicked us out. Major Patrick Fraser walked me out to my car. We didn't say a word the whole way across the big empty parking lot. I thought maybe he was mad at me because I'd teased him a bit about his big feet as we were leaving. Later he confessed it was because he wanted to kiss me so bad his knees were shaking.