Riley Mackenzie - Beautifully Awake

I jumped when he slammed his fist against the shower wall then buried his face in my neck.

“Chase, please. Don’t let him ruin this, please, this is ours. I want you ... I need this, please.” I couldn’t let that bastard win. He had no power over me. Not anymore.

“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so fucking livid about what he did to you, but you’re right. No more, Blue.” His voice instantly softened. He slid his hands up across my stomach to cup my breasts, gently tugging on my hard buds. “I want to erase those memories. I want to be your only memory.” His mouth kissed and sucked at that spot between my neck and collarbone. My head fell to the side giving him better access. My temple rested against the cold tile, sending a shiver up my spine. He wrapped his arms around me, hugging me tightly. His wet tongue swept up my neck until it hovered over my ear. Then he began to hum. My breath caught. I was stunned into silence, listening and savoring every sweet note. I’d never heard him sing. The tension surrounding music in his life was because of his sister. A place he never visited. The part of his life he kept trapped deep beneath his beautiful, yet he was bringing me there. To that hole in his heart. I could tell he sensed my body relaxing again. “Get on your knees for me, only me. I would never ever hurt you, baby, you have to know that. I promise to take it slow, but we are going to do this. We’re going to wash it all away forever.”

I did as I was told without a bit of hesitation. I trusted him. I loved him.

“I love you so much,” he whispered, smiling against my cheek before he peppered me with sweet soft kisses. And then I heard his voice. Low, deep, and masculine.

My eyes welled. He was singing my favorite song. All those times he let me choose the music in the operating room, when he said he couldn’t care less, he listened. Took note.

I reached behind and touched what I wanted. What I needed. I brought him to my entrance, urging him on. I was so wet, so ready. He gently slid inside me, and I gasped at the pure tenderness. His soft breath continued to bathe the nape of my neck. He was intoxicating. Tears of pure joy poured down my cheeks as he pushed deep into me from behind, erasing every sour memory, making sweet love to me.

“I won’t give up on us.” His arrangement was the sweetest I’d ever heard.

His embrace tightened around my chest while he continued to sing. I couldn’t tell where my body ended and his began. The promise in his message was crystal clear. He was done running and willing to fight for me, for us.

“Lili, truth. We are worth it.”

He owned my heart and my soul. My climax built within minutes. His length grew harder as he rocked against me, filling me. I knew he was getting close and I wanted our release to be together. His voice was raspy and sexy as hell as he sung through his roaring orgasm. He shuddered once against me, causing me to join in our earth shattering union.

He slowly pulled out and nestled us onto the bench. “Look at me, Lili.”

My blissfully sated lids opened to his tender gaze.

“I love you so fucking much, you are my world.” He buried his face into my neck and clung to me. I was his lifeline as much as he was mine.

“About time you lovebirds left the room,” Sierra shouted from Dodd’s lap.

Chase laughed and I totally blushed, but was hopefully hidden by the night sky. We had spent most of the early evening reacquainting each other with every square inch of our bodies. We finally joined the rest of the gang on the beach for a late night bonfire. The only illumination coming off the dark ocean backdrop was the swirls of reds and oranges escaping from the crackling wood. The scene around me was pure contentment. My friends were laying on cozy blankets enjoying late night cocktails. Their soft voices, laced with laughter, were drowned out by the ocean waves crashing on the shore. This was peace. I was finally at peace. My body trembled slightly; maybe the breeze off the water gave me a chill.

“You chilly, baby? I’ll run to the room and grab another sweater,” Chase whispered as he pulled me tight to his side, running a hand up and down my arm.

“I’m fine.” Better than fine. More fine than I’ve been in three years. “Just really happy,” I whispered back.

“Me too, Blue. Me too.” His grin killed me.

“So he’s finally sharing you?” Sierra rolled her eyes in Chase’s direction. Her sarcasm was lost on no one.

“And so it starts,” I mumbled with apologetic eyes.

Sierra walked over and tugged on my hand, leading me back toward her spot in front of the fire. Chase didn’t let go of my other hand.

“Look at you two, it’s like you’re glued together.” She pouted her lips in the most unattractive way. I had to remember to tell her, she needed to rethink her grossed out face. For sure.

Dr. Possessive might have agreed to share for a few hours, but that didn’t stop him from staking his claim. He picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder.

“Chase,” I whined, giggling like crazy. If it were anyone else, I probably would have been seriously turned off by such caveman antics. But I wasn’t. It was Chase. My Chase. And I loved how much he needed to feel close to me.

“Oh fine, you can come too,” Sierra’s eye roll was a little warmer this time. Dr. Charming was working his magic.

“Thanks, but I’d like that invitation to extend to your spa day when you’re soaking in seaweed and wearing those fluffy robes.” Chase flashed that killer smile. Sierra didn’t have a chance.

It was Sierra’s turn to laugh. She turned to look at me as Chase was putting me down. “That’s it! I’m calling him Dr. P ... possessive and pushy.” Everyone including Chase erupted into laughter. My BFF was caving. I knew she would see past intense Chase and see the man I loved.

“Sorry, Chase, you’ll get used to her soon enough. Blunt and bossy are her middle names.”

“Whatever, Dodd,” Sierra huffed, waddling toward her seated husband. Yep, she was officially a waddler.

“What, hun? I love that about you, you’re always so matter of fact.” Dodd seductively ran his hands up Sierra’s side, pulling her down onto his lap and kissing her deeply. PDA was not lost on those two. “Lord help me, though, if our baby girl has half your sauce. I’m in trouble.”

“Get a room! Make a baby ... oh wait, you already did that,” Jack yelled from the other side of the bonfire as the catcalls filled the air. We all laughed again.

“See, Sier, you can dish it, but you can’t take it. Dodd’s gotta suck your face to keep you from pouting.”

Even though Sierra was funny, super sarcastic and hard as a rock on the outside, her heart was warm and fuzzy. And she was my rock through thick and thin. Always there to pick up my pieces, no matter day or night. I thought back to how many times over this month alone she saved my ass from falling over the edge into that deep dark hole.

“No, I just like when he sucks my face.” Typical Sierra.

I grinned. “You’re too much, Asspuck.”

Chase had joined Dodd on the blanket, falling back onto his elbows. His linen button down pulled across his chest just enough to see that tanned skin I craved. He was so sexy and all mine. I couldn’t help but smile. He totally caught me checking him out, then cradled me onto his lap and whispered in a low gravelly voice, “Dr. P can think of a couple other areas I would love to suck right now.”

Oh no he didn’t. God, I hoped it was just a whisper. I blushed bigtime.

Chase fished through his wallet before yanking out a white card. He swiped it over the keypad just outside the car window, allowing the gate to open and for us to pass. The large white sign read KimCore. So this was his company.

Our ride from Cape Cod was relatively quiet. For the most part we made idle chitchat while I focused on how Chase brought me to a place I never thought possible. A place of love and happiness. But I also knew Chase was seeking closure, and returning to Boston, where his sister died and was laid to rest, was weighing heavily on his shoulders. This visit was crucial to his healing process. And important for the health and progression of our relationship.

My phone chirped inside my bag, pulling me out of my head. From its muffled sound I assumed it was somewhere in the bottom of the endless pit. Chase smirked as I dug deeper.

“Blue, truth. That’s the worst fucking bag I’ve ever seen,” he teased while slowly driving through the parking lot.

“Hey. It was a gift and it’s designer.”

“It’s luggage. It’s got to go.”

I scrunched my nose in protest, which lasted all of two seconds. He shrugged his broad shoulders, looking adorable, as if to say—what, am I wrong? We both laughed, relieving the tension we refused to admit was building in the car once we hit Boston.

Chase parked the car. “Tell you what, after lunch, we’ll go shopping and replace your designer luggage with something that doesn’t weigh as much as you. Sound good?” His knuckles softly brushed across my cheek, reaching my lips, where I gladly returned the sentiment with a kiss.

“Sounds good,” I said, because it did.

It had nothing to do with a bag or shopping, it was the promise of later. Of us being an us. No more second-guessing. Chase expected me to object like I always did when he talked about buying me things, but his expression changed when he realized I wasn’t going to protest, at least not this time.

“So?” Chase nodded toward the phone I’d finally found. I had to admit he was right—the damn bag was annoying.