Beth Hyland - Fall Into Forever

Before Ivy, I mistakenly thought I was happy—the parties, the drinking, the girls—but I was just going through the motions, keeping myself numb enough that I didn’t have to think about what I was running from.

Somehow, that beautiful, amazing girl managed to smooth the jagged edges of my heart. I’m not the angry, messed up guy I thought I was. She grounds me. Makes me believe in myself. Because of her, I am…better.

From my perch on the ladder where I’m repairing the gutters on Stella’s house, I hear the sound of Ivy’s laughter. I turn and see the two of them doing a silly dance in the driveway. Guess that means the garage sale was a success.

A powerful pride swells in my chest as I think about how she stood up to Aaron. All by her fucking self. And to think that he and his friends had been harassing her online since Chase died. When I saw him face to face, all I wanted to do was rip his fucking head off. Make him pay for what he’d been doing to her…and for what his brother did. I was on the verge of going completely ballistic, but somehow, her reasoning and logic cut through my anger. How the hell had she talked me off that ledge?

“Thirsty?”

I must’ve been lost in my thoughts for a while, because I didn’t hear Ivy approach. She’s standing at the bottom of the ladder, looking up at me with her gorgeous green eyes and holding a glass of iced tea. The late afternoon sun glints off her hair, making it look more red than brown. My breath catches in my throat.

I know this sounds corny, but I think she really believes I can hang the moon. If I want to do something, no matter how hard or difficult, she’ll assume I can do it.

Ignoring my half-full bottle of water sitting on the roof, I smile. “Yeah, I’m parched.”

I climb down the ladder and wrap an arm around her waist, drawing her body to mine. The vanilla scent of her shampoo fills my lungs, and I sigh.

Ivy McAllister will always be exactly what I need.

Ivy

Three months later

I’m back in Lincoln Falls for the first time since Christmas break.

Coffee Addicts offered me a full-time job for the summer, so I took it. Since Cassidy hadn’t decided if she was coming back next year, when I heard that Reese and Kelly needed someone to rent their extra bedroom, I agreed to take it. Jon has dropped some not-so-subtle hints that he wants to move in with me. Of course I’d love that, but I haven’t told him yet. A girl needs to play hard to get sometimes, you know?

Jon picked up a few more shifts at the radio station and he started teaching guitar lessons at a music store in town. Most of his students are kids and he loves it. Although people do mention who his father is sometimes, most haven’t made a big deal about it. Probably because of how Jon handled himself in the aftermath. He’s got enough charisma and personality of his own. He doesn’t need his father for that. He told his station manager there was no way in hell he was doing an O-Twist feature, so they dropped the subject. And after telling the reporter he wasn’t interested in being interviewed, she stopped calling.

Even though I wasn’t crazy about coming back to Lincoln Falls—College View is my home now—it’s Rose’s sixteenth birthday, and I promised to come.

My mom forgot to pick up vanilla ice cream for the cake, so she sent Jon and me to the grocery store.

As we walk past the dairy aisle, Jon grabs my arm and turns me around. Just as I open my mouth to protest whatever it is he’s doing, he squirts whipped cream into my mouth.

“What the hell?” I say, but it sounds more like whah ah ell. I look around quickly to see if anyone sees us. There’s a woman about fifteen feet away examining the eggs, but I don’t think she saw us. Covering my mouth with my hand, I swallow.

“There. It’s your first real whip hit.”

I poke my fingers at that tender spot on his hip where I know he’s the most ticklish. He tries jumping backward, but the dairy case is right behind him. “I can’t believe you just did that.”

“You’re no longer a virgin, Ives. It’s painful, but isn’t it worth it?”

I make that really unflattering snort slash laugh that I do sometimes. I’m really going to get him now. I reach for him again, but he dances just out of my reach, laughing. I drop my shopping basket and lunge for him.

“Sorry, Ives, I’m just too damn fast.”

“Just you wait,” I tell him, picking up the basket. “When you least expect it, expect it.” Noticing that the woman with the eggs is pushing her shopping cart in our direction, I give Jon the evil eye. “Behave,” I say to him through clenched teeth. I’d sign, but my hands are full. “Remember, people know me here.”

I stop in front of the ice cream case. As I’m trying to decide what brand to buy, Jon walks to the front of the aisle and starts looking at the magazines. I hear someone come up behind me. I stiffen. It’s not the store manager, is it, planning to bust us for doing whip hits?

“Ivy?”

I turn to see Lana Marquette, Chase’s mother.

I swallow nervously. “Hi Mrs. Marquette.” She’s always been very nice to me. Quiet, but nice.

“You must be home from school,” she says. “Are you liking it up there?”

“Yes, very much.” I suddenly feel very sad. She looks thinner than the last time I saw her, her face gaunt. It’s clear she’s been through a lot these past few years. “I’m…I’m sorry I didn’t make it to Chase’s memorial service.”

She flashes me a grateful smile. “I appreciate that, but I didn’t expect you to come. I think you were either still in the hospital or you’d just come home.”

She’s giving me an out. We both know I’d been home for almost a month by the time the service was held.

“We heard about what Aaron’s been doing to you.”

My eyes go wide. “You have?”

She presses her lips into a thin line and nods. “When his father found out that PSU pulled their offer, he called and learned what had happened. The school shared with him a few of the choicer emails Aaron had sent to you. When he confronted Aaron about it, he admitted to giving you a hard time since the accident.”

Hard time doesn’t begin to describe it, but I don’t say anything.

She pauses, her voice getting even quieter. “Chase was angry with you, wasn’t he?”

I stare at her, not sure what to say.

“You don’t need to answer that if you don’t want to. I just know that he was very upset the last time I saw him. Angrier than I’d ever seen him before.”

“I had just broken up with him.” I was about to say that it was my fault, but I stop myself. It wasn’t my fault. It was his.

She nods. “I loved my son, but that doesn’t surprise me. He had a temper just like his father’s.” She looks around nervously, then leans in a little closer. “I’d have left Ace if I had been courageous like you, but I was stupid and got myself pregnant.”

I blink a few times, unsure of what I just heard. “Stupid? You weren’t stupid, Mrs. Marquette. Sometimes accidents… Well, they just happen.” Either that, or assholes poke holes in the condoms, but I don’t say that, either.

“Good luck with everything, Ivy. You’ve got a great future ahead of you.”

I stare after her as she pushes her shopping cart away.

There but for the grace of God…

* * *

The visit with my family went surprisingly well, due in part because my father’s company won the bid and my parents were in great spirits. Jon taught my little sister how to play her favorite Taylor Swift song on the guitar, and he talked about the construction business with my dad.

On the way back to Washington, we stop for gas at a mom-and-pop store in Olive Grove that also sells old-fashioned hard ice cream and antiques. We’re sitting on a picnic table, eating our cones and looking out over the valley. The name of the town reminds me of Jon’s family.

I turn to him. Maybe now’s the right time. “Did you know that I talked to your father at the concert after they took you away?”

“Yeah, I heard that.”

“I won’t go into everything I told him, other than the fact that I didn’t mince any words. It also confirmed the fact that I’m glad he wasn’t in your life, Jon. He really is an asshole.” Ice cream is dripping down the side of the cone and onto my hand. I lick it off, then pull out my phone and scroll through my contacts.

“I did get this, however.”

“What is it?” he asks, frowning.

“Your grandparents’ phone number. Your father admitted to me that he’d never told them about you. I’m not sure how they found out about you, but they did.”

Jon stares at the number on my phone for a long time. So long, in fact, that his cone melts and he has to throw it into the bushes.

“I think you should call them,” I say quietly.

Without saying a word, he pulls out his own phone, and stares at it for what feels like forever. Then he takes a deep breath and dials. There’s a pause and then, “Grandma? This is Jon. Your grandson. Can you talk?”

I get up to give him some privacy and head back into the little store. To pass the time, I look through a tray of antique costume jewelry, but honestly, I can barely concentrate. I pray that the call goes well. Spotting a few Hummel pieces in the glass case under the counter, I absently wonder if Stella has any of them.

A few minutes later, Jon comes up from behind and wraps his arms around me.