Kennedy was suddenly in her face, but she stared past him as Cabrera and Neal, who looked sick and angry, picked up Spencer roughly by the scruff of his collar. Emma saw his pants shucked down a few inches below his waist and she gagged, clawing at her arms and neck and legs. Angry red lines appeared on her face as she sobbed and scratched away the evidence of what happened, but looking at her fingertips, blood and flesh beneath her nails, she felt the bile rise again.

"Emma," Kennedy soothed. He tried to hold her shoulders, but she pushed him away.

"Don't touch me!" she demanded in a shriek.

"Okay," he relented softly, backing away with his hands up. "Okay. It's okay. You're okay."

She shook her head, clawing at her hair and tugging at the roots. She hid her face between her knees where her tears tracked on the material. "Don't."

Kennedy hovered over her, and if she had looked up, she would have seen the sympathetic grimace on his face, his own eyes welling up at the reality of the situation, mixed with disgust for the man dragged out of the school house. But she didn't, and even if she did, all she would be able to see were the stars dancing in front of her eyes as Spencer's body pressed against hers.

Chapter 18

Chapter Notes

Disclaimer in Chapter One

Halfway across the world, though really 5,600 miles away, Regina was laughing in Tina's loft, a wine glass between her fingers and her back settled comfortably on the futon in the living room. These ladies night as Ruby so liked to call them had become quite a treat for her even though she was reluctant to partake initially. More often than not, David would sit for Henry at the mansion or at the Nolan's, though the one time he declined due to undisclosed deputy business had Kathryn turning a blind eye and draining more alcohol than normal that night and the other three women suspecting curiously since Graham had clearly been free that evening.

Most times they took turns playing hostess, and currently, Tina's one bedroom loft was being used as their entertainment area where she was draped over an accent chair, legs dangling over the armrest, Kathryn sharing Regina's futon with a throw pillow tucked against her stomach, and Ruby on the floor, her back against the futon as she fawned over Josh Hartnett on the television screen.

"Kate Beckinsale was so lucky in that movie," the waitress commented enviously.

"Acting between Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett," Kathryn added, fanning herself with a palm. "Makes me think I got into the wrong career."

Tina scoffed and stood with her empty beer can, moving to get another. "They're the lucky ones. Have you not seen her in Underworld?"

Regina shook her head playfully when Tina got to the fridge. "It's hard to believe you're the one teaching our children."

"I give them something to believe in." She retrieved her beer and sat back down, popping open the can. "Plus, I turn them all into beautiful singers and ice skaters."

"Debatable," Ruby muttered, making the two women on the futon smile in laughter.

"Out of you lot, I've got the best job here," the curly haired blonde argued. "I guide the future."

"You're not a real teacher," Ruby teased, poking her with foot, making the curly-haired blonde glare and gesture in a way no child she taught should ever see.

"Ugh," Kathryn groaned and held her arms up, shaking her head. "No teacher talk. Teacher-free night please."

"We should trail him one night."

"I could increase the paperwork at the station, so he has no free time to spend elsewhere but home."

"I can spit in his food."

"No," Kathryn shook her head and leaned over to the side table to refresh her third glass of red. "I want him to admit it." She downed half the glads. "Then I'll take half his money."

The women all laughed, Kathryn toasting her wine glass with Ruby's bottle of Smirnoff.

"Never mess with a lawyer," the waitress grinned.

"But you know what gets me?" Kathryn continued, taking half a second to gulp the remainder of her drink. "I still care, you know? Every time he's out working, and I know he's out working, or he comes home and he's pulled a muscle chasing down some petty burglar or even Pongo, I still get worried something more is going to happen to him."

"You've been married for years, dear, what do you expect?"

"To be an unemotional robot."

"Like me?" Regina quipped.

"How you used to be," the blonde teased.

"I could never put myself through that," Ruby said off-handedly before turning her head swiftly back and offering an apologetic shrug. "No offence."

Regina furrowed her brow. "For what?"

"I just mean, I could never do what you guys do. Having a relationship with someone like David who fights crime, being an army wife."

"I'm not—"

"You're an army wife," Tina cut her off.

"You're scared for David in Storybrooke," Ruby continued to Kathryn then looked at Regina, "I couldn't imagine being scared for Emma in Iraq."

"You're dating August," Regina argued, the inflection in her tone rising defensively.

"But he's here," the younger brunette said softly.

Regina was taken aback by the sudden turn of conversation and pressed herself against the cushions in thought. She always thought she was irrational, falling so hard and so quickly for a soldier, for Emma, but to hear it voiced aloud was another story. There was an awkward silence surrounding them with the only sound coming from the television set as Josh Hartnett chased Kate Beckinsale playfully around an airplane hangar. Yes, it was unorthodox, and something Regina would never think she would have done. But things changed.

Ruby patted her leg sympathetically and Kathryn reached over and squeezed her arm, but it was Tina who voiced the unasked question so many residents in Storybrooke asked among themselves. "How do you do it?" Regina quirked an eyebrow for clarification. "Long-distance relationships are one thing, but this—Regina, she's fighting in a war."

"This is not some 1920's battle where she's sleeping in a trench every day," Regina cut in haughtily.

"No, but she has a bullseye on her back just by wearing that uniform. What if something happens to her?"

"She's a good soldier, Ms. Bell," Regina said sharply, her mayoral tone leaking through as if she could block the voiced fears in her head with a quick tongue. "She sacrifices a lot just so you have the right to even voice your doubt in her."

"I'm not doubting her, Regina, I'm being realistic."

"You act as if it's a death sentence."

"I'm asking how you don't think that." Tina was on the edge of her seat now, talking loudly over Ruby and Kathryn's head who had made themselves small as the two women argued. "I'm not doubting her or questioning you. You're so strong, Regina, and I'm just asking how because you, out of all people, would never do something so crazy like that."

"Crazy," Regina enunciated slowly. Tina winced and Kathryn visibly flinched. Ruby was in the right to shimmy over and away from the Mayor as Regina stood from her spot in the couch. "You think I'm crazy."

"Not crazy," Tina amended, easing herself cautiously to her feet. Whatever explanation the preschool teacher had was interrupted by Regina's harsh retort.

"And how crazy are you for solely taking on the responsibility of four teenage boys who have done nothing but vandalize and steal?"

Tina's face darkened. "They're good boys."

"And Emma is a good soldier. Arguably one of the best, and I don't appreciate you slandering her name."

"Regina, I'm not trying to offend you."

"Oh, you don't have to try, dear." She simply deposited her glass on the table and stood, gathering her coat and purse from the breakfast bar.

"Hey, guys, come on, let's just finish the movie," Ruby hoped.

But Regina didn't answer, too consumed in her own head to even figure out the thinly veiled compliment behind what she perceived to be an insult. Emma always came back. Even if it was just for a month, a week, a day, a phone call, she always came back. She didn't need to have that belief stripped from her. Not from someone who didn't understand.

"Regina, don't go," Kathryn pleaded, but all it was met with was a slammed door.


Despite the setback in their ladies night and the silent treatment Regina gave Tina for two solid days, the change in the once hardened Mayor clearly had long term effects since the following Friday, Regina had sent an email saying she was happy to host the next get together. Still, all four women never brought it up again and avoided war films despite how dreamy the lead actor was. Ruby had pouted at that since she had a sudden hankering to watch Saving Private Ryan , but the three of them secretly agreed that a distracted Regina was a happy one.

Regina knew they were beating around the bush about her relationship with Emma, but she couldn't tell if she appreciated or hated it. Pretending Emma was away on business, that she was just a simple cop living in another city, even travelling abroad, could only do so much. At the end of the day, her fears Tina was brave enough to voice assaulted her mind with what ifs and scenarios she had no control over. For two months, she batted away the insecurities, and with every letter she sent to Emma that went unanswered and every day that passed without receiving a call, Regina was going stir crazy.

Until one night her fears caught up with her in the form of a 3 AM phone call.