As his big car zoomed away from her, the tears she had held back slipped down her cheeks in a scalding flow.

She watched his car until it vanished into the big empty landscape, and the knowledge that she was doing the right thing didn't help her at all.

"I'm sorry, Grant." Her voice was low and muffled by her sobs. "So sorry."

But he was too far away to hear her. Too far away to know of the desperate pain in her heart that his leaving caused her.


Norie sat at the same table where she'd shared breakfast with Grant only an hour earlier. On the surface, everything was just as before. Except for the fact that it was Sara who was seated at the table with her.

There was no visible trace of Grant in the kitchen. No visible trace of him anywhere except in her heart.

The farmhouse was cozily warm. Sara had lit several of the space heaters, both upstairs and downstairs. The two women were in the kitchen dipping their tea bags into their cups. Leo and Darius were in Node's bedroom looking at the ornaments and presents.

"So who was he, Norie?" Sara demanded quietly. Her soft brown eyes were aglow with curiosity and concern.

Norie sipped her tea, too upset to reply. She wondered if her life would ever be the same without him. Instead of answering her friend, she listened to their sons in the next room.

"Yeah, Leo, I made this one."

"I could tell 'cause you forgot to paint the reindeer's hoof."

"And I popped the popcorn and stringed it. Mom made most of the good things though."

"You don't have as many presents as me under your tree."

"That's 'cause I want something special. See, Santa's gotta bring it all the way from the North Pole. And it could smother in his bag."

"What do you want?"

"Santa knows."

"I bet it's a dog."

"It's sorta like a dog. Only better."

The boys began to whisper conspiratorially.

But Norie couldn't hear them. Her own heart was pounding too hard.

"Mom!" Darius yelled from the doorway.

"Darius, that's your outside voice," she murmured softly, correcting him out of maternal habit.

His impatient tone was only a fraction softer. "Where's all my stuff?"

"In your room."

"Everything?" He cocked his four-year-old brows as arrogantly as any Hale.

She nodded.

"Mom, I had things out where I wanted them."

She smiled. "Out is where you want everything." But she was talking to an empty doorway. The boys were racing each other up the stairs like a pair of rough-and-tumble puppies.

"Boys! Leo! No running!" Sara called.

They pretended not to hear. The wild footsteps careened up the stairs and down the hall overhead.

"They sound like a herd of stampeding elephants." Sara giggled.

Norie cringed when doors opened and slammed. "So much for minding."

"They're just excited over Christmas," Sara said.

Norie sipped her tea.

"So who was that very attractive man?" Sara repeated her earlier question.

Norie had dreaded this. "My brother-in-law."

"What happened to his car?" Sara eyed the plump stack of legal papers in their blue folders that Norie had placed on the edge of the table. "Why was he here?"

"Sara, it's something I can't talk about, not even to you."

"Jim's right about you being mysterious."

Galloping footsteps crashed down the stairs, and a breathless Darius flung himself into the kitchen. "Hey, Mom, who slept in the guest bed upstairs?"

Sara arched her brows knowingly, and Noreen turned red.

"Can we play in there, Mom? The fire's on, and it's real warm."

"No!" The single word was too sharp, and Darius, who was not used to such sternness from her, looked hurt. More gently she said, "You bring your things down here where we can watch you."

"But we want to play up there by ourselves."

"No."

"You never let us."

"Darius!"

Mother and son stared at one another across the kitchen. Darius's lower lip swelled mutinously.

"Darius, remember about Santa. He rewards good little boys."

Darius gulped in a big breath.

Then Leo said, "Can we build a house by the tree with blankets and cushions?"

"Of course, but try not to make too big a mess."

Sara laughed. "You don't mind asking the impossible."

Leo was running back up the stairs, and Darius was right behind him.

The showdown was over. At least the one between mother and son. Norie knew that Sara was more determined.

"So your brother-in-law spent the weekend here?" Sara asked softly. "With you? Alone?"

Norie got up to pour more water into the kettle. Then she went to the stove. Her back was to Sara. "He skidded into the ditch. I couldn't very well leave him there."

"Something tells me you didn't want to leave him there."

"Much as I love you, Sara, I'm just not ready to talk about Grant."

"Well, I'll be here when you are."

"I know. You have always been my dear, dear friend."

It was a long time before Norie could turn around and pretend to Sara that everything was normal.


The next few days were the bleakest and loneliest Norie had ever known. They were even worse than when she had come to town pregnant and alone to live with Miss Maddie. No matter what she did or where she went, Norie couldn't quit thinking of Grant.

When she was Christmas shopping, she would see things she wanted to buy for him. She'd even bought one gift-a beautiful blue silk dress shirt that would look wonderful on him because of his blue eyes. It had seemed so stupid and silly, buying a present for a man she would never see again.

When she got home, she hid the gift under her bed. But sometimes she took it out to admire it secretly and dream of really being able to give it to him.

At night she lay awake thinking about him, seeing in her mind his every gesture, his every smile, remembering the exact things he'd said to her. Most of all, she remembered the way he'd gently, tenderly, brought her again and again to shuddering heights of ecstasy.

And every time she looked at Darius, she saw Grant. With his black hair and dazzling blue eyes, Darius was almost a miniature replica of his handsome uncle. Darius did not mention the special gift he had asked Santa for again, but every time Norie looked at him she knew that he was silently longing for a father-as once Grant had longed for his father. She felt Darius's special excitement, his expectancy, and these things only made her sadder.

Somehow she got through the days and the nights.


It was Christmas Eve, the night her church held a beautiful candlelight service. Norie was sitting alone on a wooden pew watching Darius, who was in the children's choir. Her black dress was tied at the waist with a handmade lavender sash. As always, large loops dangled from her ears…

Darius and Leo were wearing white choir robes with huge red satin bows tied beneath their scrubbed chins. They looked like angels, and they sounded like them too, as their voices and those of the other children filled the sanctuary with the lovely familiar melodies of sacred Christmas carols.

The service was an hour long, and it was a time of beauty and peace for Norie. All too soon the lights of the sanctuary were put out. For a moment there was darkness except for a single candle. Then the candles of the congregation were lit one by one. A hush filled the church, and Norie whispered a prayer that made her own candle flutter gently. Merry Christmas, Grant. Be happy. Wherever you are.

"Silent Night" was played, and so many candles were lit that the church became more brilliant than she'd ever seen it.

She felt an arm brush her waist possessively, and she turned.

Grant was there beside her.

For a moment he stood without moving, just looking down at her. Then he smiled at her boyishly, charmingly. His eyes were filled with tenderness and warmth, and some powerful emotion she couldn't be sure of.

She could barely see him for the mist of emotion that rushed at her.

"Grant… " A radiant smile broke across her face.

Black hair, blue eyes. He was movie-star handsome in a dark, conventional suit and tie as he towered beside her.

Her pulse stirred with a thrilling joy.

His hand closed over hers, and suddenly she knew how much she loved him. It didn't matter that she could never be as socially correct as his mother or the other women he had dated. Norie was still scared, scared of loving him, but in all her life she had never felt the swell of love that she felt for this man. The past-Larry, the Hales, their money and its misuse, all the grief, the rejection, and the heartbreak-no longer mattered so much.

"Merry Christmas," she whispered, her voice warm and light and happy.

"I had to come, gypsy girl," he said quietly.

His low, raspy voice was the most beautiful sound she had ever heard; more beautiful even than the sound of the angels. Gently he touched one of her gold loop earrings.

Her lashes, strangely heavy, fluttered down, but she felt the warmth of his caring in every cell of her body.

For her the world held promise once again.

Shyly, she squeezed his strong hand.

She was wrapped in happiness as she listened to the haunting loveliness of the last verse of "Silent Night."

For the first time in years Christmas really seemed a time of love and renewal and rebirth. Then she glanced up and beneath the glimmering jewel-bright stained glass windows, she saw two angelic-looking little boys in white robes and red bows. Darius's big blue eyes were wide and curious as he studied Grant. Then he smiled happily, knowingly, and he sang so joyously that Norie imagined she could hear his voice soaring above all the others in the choir and congregation. It was Christmas Eve, and Darius believed very firmly in the magic of Christmas.