"Dinner the other night was a complete replay of our lives with you children except that Samantha had you and Zoe to protect her. And the child has more spunk than anyone I've ever met," she said, with what sounded like affection in her tone.
"Spunk is a good word to describe Sam's behavior," Ryan agreed, his eyes filled with warmth when he gazed at his mother.
Even Zoe had to admit she was touched by the woman's willingness to try and change. Relief filled her, as well, since Sam would benefit from her softening and changing.
"I didn't sleep that night. And I realized then that I could continue to play the socialite who cared more for rules than her family and thereby lose Faith's daughter, too, or I could take the initiative and try to change my attitude. For the sake of my family, I decided that an old dog should learn new tricks." Vivian forced a laugh, but her body trembled with the emotion of the afternoon.
Emotion Zoe shared, since she now had no choice but to take the distance she'd tried to maintain and place it firmly between herself and Ryan. He was a good man and on the verge of having his niece accepted by his family. Zoe would have no place in their lives beyond that of a long-distance friend. She couldn't when she and Ryan, for all their passion, had so little in common.
She glanced at Ryan and met his gaze, her throat heavy with grief. No matter how much her heart begged her to believe otherwise, her mind told her that their different lives, different ways of doing things, and completely opposite families would never mesh long-term. On a selfish note, his family's way of life had the potential to stifle the strong woman she prided herself on being and the independent person she intended to become.
Giving him an encouraging nod, Zoe then watched as he changed his focus toward his mother and, knowing it was time, Zoe stepped back and away.
Ryan reluctantly turned from Zoe to stare at his mother and his head spun. He was in awe, completely blindsided by her admissions, her guilt and her desire to do better. Shock, gratitude, and even love for this woman who'd always remained distant swirled inside him.
Ignoring her attempt to remain stoic and alone, Ryan placed his arm around her shoulder. If he needed the physical connection to his parent, he decided that she must need it, too. To his never-ending surprise, she wrapped her arm around his waist, acknowledging his gesture.
But he couldn't take his eyes off Zoe. She stood off to one side, her expression soft as she smiled. She was clearly touched by the mother-son moment. But as the silence continued, she grew more uncomfortable. She shifted from heel to heel and appeared unusually alone for a woman normally filled with confidence.
He wanted to pull her into the moment, but she obviously wasn't ready for such a move.
"I want you to understand that I was questioning you for Sam's sake, not for my own," Zoe said into the silence.
His mother eyed Zoe warily. She obviously still didn't know what to make of Zoe's place in this situation and Ryan wasn't ready to fill her in. Not when he knew even Zoe wasn't ready to hear the truth.
Before he could ease the tension, Zoe started to talk. "You see, my family has been where you are. Sam has tested us, too, and we discovered that she responds well to punishment based on caring, but she rebels against rules for their own sake. All Sam wants is to be loved, accepted and to know she fits in." She finished quickly, out of breath.
"That's…"
"I'm rambling." Zoe interrupted his mother. She waved a hand through the air. "This is all between you and your son." She took a step backward, and then another.
Ryan knew she was searching for distance. He couldn't allow her to find it. Zoe was used to love and acceptance from her family, yet she'd closed herself off to the possibility of finding love with him.
Ryan had every intention of changing that.
NEAR MIDNIGHT, Ryan, unable to sleep, opened his door to find a light shining from the living room. He figured it was Zoe, but instead found Sam wandering around the room, looking at his framed pictures. Most were of family and he could understand her curiosity. He still had a lot of questions about Sam herself. They hadn't spent much time alone since they'd met and he figured now was as good a time as any to try and forge a deeper bond with her.
He strode into the room and cleared his throat.
Sam jumped back, a squeal escaping her throat. "You scared me." She hugged a framed photo tight against her chest.
"I didn't mean to. What are you doing up so late?"
She shrugged. "I couldn't sleep."
"Me neither. So what are you looking at?" he asked.
She placed the picture face down on the table and stepped back almost guiltily.
He joined her and turned over the frame. It was the one he had of her mother. He stared at the familiar blond hair and bone structure and shook his head. "It's amazing how much you look like her," he said, turning the photo so she could see it again.
"My memories were getting blurry." Sam pulled the picture from his hand. Glancing at the photo, she blinked and a tear fell.
In her oversize pajama pants and tank top, she was an odd mixture of child and young adult. He wanted to hug her, but knew she wouldn't accept comfort from him yet. "You can keep the picture," he said instead.
"You mean it?"
"I wouldn't have offered otherwise."
She looked at him with gratitude in her wide eyes. "Do you have one for yourself?"
He shook his head.
"Then- "
Realizing she was about to decline his gesture, he came up with a more acceptable idea that would help them both. "How about we take this to a photo machine and make you a copy? You can even pick out your own frame."
She smiled. "I'd like that a lot." She paused, biting on her lower lip. "Can I ask you something?"
"Sure." He leaned against the wall and studied her.
"Why are you being so nice to me?"
He hadn't known what to expect, but she'd stumped him with that one. "Any reason I shouldn't be nice to you?"
She glanced down at her bare feet. "I don't deserve it."
He swallowed hard, surprised at how her sudden insecurity and vulnerability affected him. "I'll admit you can be a pain in the ass sometimes, but it's part of your charm." He laughed. "Besides, you're family."
"So?" She curled her toes into the hardwood, her body a bundle of raw nerves.
He wondered if she was serious. Glancing up, meeting her gaze, he realized she was. As Zoe had tried to tell him time and again, Sam didn't understand being loved and accepted. It would take a long time to convince her there was nothing she could do to change the way he felt about her.
"So, you're my niece and that binds us. You can stuff all the toilets you want and it won't get you tossed out of here. You can run away and, mark my words, I'd find you."
"You mean it?"
His throat filled as he looked at the young girl. "I mean it. I guess what I'm saying is, you're my family and I love you." He held his breath, wondering if he'd gone too far too fast.
But when Sam unexpectedly stepped forward and gave him a quick hug, he realized his honesty had been a good thing for them both. "You should get some sleep," he told her.
"Yeah. I have a big day ahead of me. I promised Grandma Vivian I'd help her fix up the garden."
"You did, huh?"
Sam raised her shoulders. "Ima messed it up. It's right I help fix it. Besides Grandma said if I did, she'd build a special pen for Ima to stay when we come visit."
Ryan blinked. "You're kidding."
"Well she wouldn't build it herself, but she did say she'd have one built for Ima. It works for me." Sam yawned, then flipped her hair out of her eyes with her hands. "I guess I'm beat." She started for the hallway, then turned. "Night, Uncle Ryan."
She padded down the hall, leaving him with a warm, fuzzy feeling of family that he'd never had before. A feeling he wanted to share with Zoe, so rather than head for his room, he paused outside her closed door.
On the other side was another female with whom he had unresolved issues and feelings. He didn't believe any talk with Zoe would be nearly as productive or end as well as the one he'd just had with Sam. But he was too wound up to sleep and decided it was time she hear what he had to say.
Although it was late, he knocked once and walked inside. Zoe lay in bed under the covers, but she didn't seem shocked to find him standing by her side. She moved over to make room for him to sit, while she propped herself up against her pillow.
"What's going on?" she asked, her voice rough from sleep.
Ryan tried like hell not to focus on her skimpy tank top or think about the matching pair of equally skimpy panties she likely wore beneath the covers. Instead he reached for her hand and chose his words.
"I had a bonding moment with Sam."
A smile touched her lips. "That's great. You and your family are beginning to make headway with her." Her voice held a somber tone.
"You don't sound thrilled."
"It's a mixed blessing," she said. "As much as I'm happy for you, your progress with Sam means that my family's role in her life is coming to an end."
"We'll work things out. You will see her again."
Through the darkness, Zoe merely stared. "We have to be up early," she said at last.
In other words, she was asking him to leave. Not yet, he thought. "You don't believe me, do you?"
"About what?"
"That you'll see Sam again."
She sighed. "Actually I do believe you. We agreed early on that you're a man of your word and I've seen that for myself many times since we met."
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